I’ve seen some great posts in the last few days about Valentine’s Day, love, romance, and so forth. The common theme is that lasting love is ultimately not about pink hearts and cupids and romance. It’s about commitment and faithfulness and walking through all that life brings with someone who loves you unconditionally. It’s an important point to make, particularly in an age of media entertainment that portrays love as a feeling or a buzz or attraction to someone’s physical features alone.
But lest true love sound to young people like it’s nothing but slogging through life, fighting life’s battles without a single moment of romance or a solitary skip of the heart, let me say it doesn’t have to be that way. The truth is that my husband of nearly 18 years still makes my heart glad whenever I see him. On the rare occasions when we’re able to plan an actual date, I still look forward to it more than ever.
Tom recently came home after playing a wedding. When he walked into the room, it took me back 19 years to one of our first dates. Way back in late 1994, we went out for hot chocolate on a snowy night before Christmas. He had just played a wedding that night also and was wearing a dark suit and crisp white shirt. No time at all had elapsed suddenly. Same wonderful man. Same twinkly brown eyes. Same Tom. Same love.
What creates that gladness in my heart is the constant kindness, consideration and selflessness my husband shows. How could any normal woman not respond in kind to that kind of love? When a man sets the tone for marriage by caring for the wife he married, a woman can rest in that and trust him with her well-being, and that spark of gladness never has to die out.
So the truth is, cupids and hearts and real, committed love aren’t mutually exclusive. We may have more lines on our faces from the passing years, but I still fall in love with Tom Schlueter every time I see him. For me, as Snow White summed it up so well, “There’s nobody like him, anywhere at all!”
P.S. Emmy and Mary are making a heart-shaped cake for their dad. Chocolate cake, pink frosting. But it’s a surprise…
8 comments
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February 12, 2013 at 17:05
Ingrid Schlueter
This article here may not seem related to the above, but it is. American parents too often have such child-centered homes that their marriages suffer. The comment the author makes about a sporting event swallowing an entire weekend is right on target. It can be any outside activity for kids actually. Then multiply that times several kids and you can see the problem. There are times to tell kids no and invest in yourselves as a couple. Or one day, your nest will be empty and you’ll look at each other as spouses and say, “Do I know you??”
http://jodyhurst.blogspot.com/2013/02/putting-your-spouse-first-actually-puts.html
February 12, 2013 at 19:30
Donna
Or, as we say in our house, “you are my person in all the world.” I am happy that you and I are both so lucky as to have wonderful husbands–and to still be in love with them and to know that they are with us.
February 12, 2013 at 19:39
Carol
You are Blessed by God! Happy Valentine’s Day to you and Tom and family!
February 13, 2013 at 16:21
Margaret L. Been
So beautiful, and so true! I also have been blessed with a husband “for all seasons”. He keeps me young, after nearly 60 years of marriage.
February 13, 2013 at 17:05
Sam
That’s the paradox of love, isn’t it? The more we think of our spouse, the happier we are. The more we think of ourselves and our needs, the more miserable we become. And, yes, I am totally in love with my wife.
February 13, 2013 at 18:15
Kris
What would I ever have done without my hubby? I don’t know. It’s not about the flowers, chocolates, maybe dinner out, etc…that’s the little extra bonuses. God knew we were sweethearts and soul mates long ago. Thank you Lord for the blessing of Mike. I love him more today than I did yesterday…Kris
February 14, 2013 at 00:29
Donna
Not only does Ingrid’s post make me happy, the comments here do as well. I avoid people who complain about their spouse and I truly can’t abide being around with people who snipe at/about each other. But I so enjoy seeing/hearing/reading about people who love and are in love with their husband or wife. Margaret for almost 60 years, me for almost 30, my parents who were so wonderful together for 51 years, newlyweds, and everything in between. Thank you all for really making my day.
February 14, 2013 at 21:14
Lisa Green Kentala
We are conditioned to think all marriages are unhappy in today’s world. But that’s not true. I know several very happy – long married couples. My husband and I have been married since 1985 and I can’t fathom not being married to him! Speaking of newlyweds – my husband’s niece was married last summer and as I looked over the pictures I noticed how so many older couples looked so in love. Just being at a wedding had rekindled fond memories!